Ramble On

Here are some brief observations I came to in the last couple of days.

You need to give people something free if you want them to read your pamphlet’s – You can’t walk out of Union Station in the morning without someone hawking something or trying to stick some flier in your face. The only crap I ever take are the ones in which they give you something with it. Either some candy or a pen goes along way to people taking someone’s literature. Washington Mutual has been out by Union Station for over a week trying to hand out pamphlets and no one is taking them because they aren’t giving anything away with them. Just go out and buy some Bic pens and see how quick people will take what you are handing out.

If you are under 18 you have no business being a Christian – I’m sorry when you are young you need to live. You don’t know shit about shit and one needs time to form their religious beliefs over time. When you are that young, you need to be out sewing your oats and living what the Amish call, “The Devil Years.” To spend them adhering to a strict set of non-sense rules all because your parents want to keep you chaste and ignorant is simply moronic. Live your life and then if after experiencing different people and different beliefs you still want to become a Christian then go for it. Just don’t preach to the rest of us in the logical world.

Checking out at a grocery store is a pain in the ass – Basically, at least at the Jewel by my house, you have two options. One is the self checkout. Now, this option is a good one if there is no one else using the thing. However, most times there is some clueless mouth breather who can’t figure out how to do it. Basically anyone with a third grade intellect should be able to figure out how to scan the UPC code, bag the item and then once you’re done pay for your wears. Sadly, most people I encounter in the store can’t figure out this process. Also, self checkout should be used only if you have fifteen items or less, if you have more then go to a cashier.

Of course going to a cashier is not without its complications. Usually the cashier is about as happy to be there as your average zoo cage janitor. They are stuck there no matter what so, they are in no hurry. Even if you get a good cashier you still have a good chance to be behind some old woman (and I hate to generalize here ladies but it is usually a old blue haired woman) who still writes a check to pay for their groceries. In 2007 there is simply no excuse to write checks anymore for any retail purchase. Every bank in America will give you a debit card that is linked to your checking account. Writing checks at the store is about as outdated as a Bob Hope joke. They should have one separate check writing line at Jewel and call it the 1977 line and let the rest of society move in a timely fashion.

Genesis Invisible Touch album is a piece of shit – This album was huge in the mid to late 80’s. So, some considerable time has passed since its release. After having had to endure listening and re-listening of it over and over again, I have come to the conclusion that it just might be the worst piece of music I have ever heard. The sad thing is, I like a lot of the Genesis catalog. In particular the Peter Gabriel years. But even after he left they put out some good records. However, by the time Invisible Touch came out any musical creativity they had was gone. They simply mailed it in making an un-listenable generic pop record that has the all the heart and soul of a corpse. If I ever have to hear Land of Confusion or Invisible Touch again I think I will have to blow my brains out.

I’m Old - I know that is no shocker, even to me. Still, from time to time I get reminded of the fact. I am going to Vegas in a couple of weeks. I also need a new pair of shoes. Anyone that has been to Las Vegas knows, that is no town to break in a new pair of shoes. You do a whole lot of walking in that town. So, I wanted to get a pair to break-in before we go there.

Now, I still wear Vans. I know they are not made for people my age and I should probably wear a more age appropriate shoe. But, I like what I like. Vans are comfortable and I have been wearing them forever, so I see no need to change. So, Joyce and I went out to Orland, and one of the quests at hand was to buy Nick a new pair of shoes. As I was walking in the mall we came across a store that had Vans, called Zumiez. Well, if you want to be reminded of how old you are just walk into this store.

First off I felt like I was at juice bar not a retail store as there was this lame recycled teen angst that passes off as music (and I am not one of these “there is no good current music” snobs There is some new good music out there, this just wasn’t it) blaring over the loud speakers at a decibel level that rivals a sonic boom. As I walked in to look at the shoes, I realized I was the only person even close to legal drinking age in the store. Upon entering, the clerks looked at me as if to say, hey Gramps unless you are buying a gift for your son’s homecoming get your 1980’s ass out of here.

I slowly walked up to the wall where the Vans were looked at them for about ten seconds. I glanced over to Joyce who had a look on her face that meant let’s get the fuck out of here. We quickly high tailed it out of there and got over to a JC Penny’s where we belong. They had Van’s there and I bought a pair learning a valuable lesson. I am way too old to be shopping at any store in the mall that has music playing that was released after 1990.