It's Been Awhile

Being sick kind of sucks. I was laid up for the last two days while Joyce was kind enough to wait on me hand and foot. Being basically an invalid allowed me some time to ponder some things. These are some items that leapt to my mind while I sat at home looking for the remote while Maury was on the television.

If you start feeling sorry for yourself just go to an Aldi on a Saturday afternoon. Man, there aren’t a whole lot of smiles there on a Saturday. Joyce and I made the mistake of going to Aldi during prime time and man is that place a downer. An abundance of sweat pants wearing, four kids in a shopping cart, single Mom’s litter the store. Listen, I understand times are tight (hence why I was at an Aldi in the first place. Though I will argue some of the things you get there are good. I highly recommend the ice cream sandwiches and the frozen pizza rolls.) But, I don’t think I can handle another trip there on a Saturday. When I am the best looking guy in a store there is a problem.

I love the fact my wife actually likes El Farol. Attending the finer learning institution known as Argo Community High School, I of course have had many a burrito from El Farol. I have also had my share at El Famous. (Anyone that tells you El Famous is better is nuts or has no taste buds.) I hesitate to allow my wife inside the place for fear she actually sees what is going on in there by the grill. I have gone back and forth on the place over the years but, I must admit that they make a pretty good burrito. My wife usually sticks to the taco (though I must admit she puts spinach on them when I bring them home which is kind of like putting caviar on a slider.) Still, it is cool that she likes the place because now I can eat there more often even if it is a bit of a drive.

I don’t get people who don’t look where they are walking. I was walking to the train one day last week and this guy was walking directly in my path in the opposite direction yammering away on his cell phone. If you work in the Loop you need to have that kill or be killed mentality a lot of times when walking. I was in a position where I really had no choice. The sidewalk was packed and I had nowhere to go. So, I threw a shoulder right into this guy. He was jarred and then walked back in my direction and said, “That was a pretty good shoulder you threw” like it was my fault he wasn’t watching where the fuck he was walking. I mean he walked directly into my path. So, I said thanks as genuinely as I could and kept on walking. I know there is no real point to that story, but I just had to get it off of my chest just how big of a tool that guy was.

I own a Snuggie. https://www.getsnuggie.com/flare/next This isn’t really a thought but more of an admission. I originally ordered it as a gift for my Dad for Christmas. Then after talking to him I found out he already had one. So, I was faced with either returning it or just keeping the thing. I am a lazy man and it was only $20 bucks so, I just kept it. Now at night I don’t go anywhere without it. I actually got pissed when my wife suggested using it as a blanket for our dog. I know it is lame and I expect to get nuked for it but, fuck if that thing is not comfortable.

I am going to have to sell either blood and or semen to make up for my losses at the Superbowl party. I didn’t hit one square or strip card. On top of that, at halftime we played left, center, right and I lost my ass there are well. I have no idea how much exactly how much money I blew. And oh ya I got food poisoning from eating some pasta (and the sauce which I am pretty sure was the root of the toxins) that had been sitting out for hours. Let’s just say it wasn’t exactly a banner night for Nick.