That Clinches It

I can remember where I was for each of these events. It is interesting to look back and remember where I was in my life in relation to when these sporting events took place. I will post them in chronological order going backwards.

Blackhawks Stanley Cup Clincher, June 9^th 2010 – I celebrated the only Hawks Cup in my lifetime at Tom’s Place in Lemont. We chose the place because my friend Chris had won tickets to a Cubs and Sox game and had to pick them up there. So, we decided to just have everyone watch the game at the bar. Chris got there early and basically reserved the back room for us and it wound up being a pretty good time and a great place to celebrate the Cup drinking Blatz.

Cubs 2008 NL Central Clincher, September 20^th 2008 – This was an interesting one. It was my wife’s birthday the day before. So, we had already planned on meeting Joyce’s family for an early lunch at a restaurant on the north side of the city. The Cubs played a day game. I knew their magic number was one. But, I have to be at that lunch and I can’t be in a hurry to leave. So, I had my phone and kept checking the score as we ate. I saw that the Cubs had a lead. We left the restaurant in the 8^th inning. I told Joyce, I have to see them clinch this so, we headed to the nearest bar we could find which would be the Independence Tap on Irving Park. We parked the car and we headed in and got to watch the final inning while I was enjoying a pint of PBR.

Cubs 2007 NL Central Clincher September 27^th 2007 – This one was very anticlimactic. The Cubs magic number going into the evening was 2. So a Cub win and a Brewer loss meant the division was ours. The only negative to this scenario meant that the Cubs would not be able to celebrate on the field as their game started an hour earlier than the Milwaukee game. Not knowing if it would be a clincher night or not, I was at home watching the game by myself in my basement. Sure enough the Cubs took care of business. So, I sat there watching the Brewers and Padres on ESPN. The Padres held a slim one read lead heading into the 8^th but then scored two insurance runs to put it away. So, as I said it was somewhat anticlimactic.

Cubs 2003 NL Central Clincher September 27^th 2003 – This one was memorable. It was my Aunt Joanne’s 50^th Birthday. My dad was in town to help celebrate the occasion and my Aunt had rented out a hall and everything. The Cubs had been rained out on Friday and their magic number stood at 2. Because of the rainout a double header was scheduled for the 27^th with the Pirates. Game 1 Mark Prior took care of business and the magic number was dwindled down to one. I ran home and got ready for the party between games. I made it back to my Aunts house for game 2 and I sat there in my suit and got to enjoy the celebration with my Dad as the Cubs crushed the Pirates for the clincher. We got to my Aunt’s party and for the only time in my life I did a shot with my old man to celebrate the division championship.

Cubs 1998 Wild Card Clincher September 28^th 1998 – The Cubs had to play an extra game on the 28^th to break a tie with the Giants. I remember more about the day before. The Cubs needed to win on Sunday and I was at a bar on the south side with my friends. The Cubs would lose that game and there was a table of asshole Sox fans next to mine rooting very passionately against the Cubs. (I have said it once and I will say it again, if another team’s failure gives you that much joy, that is the definition of a loser.) Anyway, the loss caused that one game playoff. I was still burned by the A-Hole Sox fans from the day before so, I chose to watch the game at my apartment in Chicago Ridge. It was a long hard fought game but the Cubs pulled it out.

Bulls Clinch 6^th title June 14^th 1998 – I was in a bad place in my life at this time. I had just broken up with my crazy nut job of a girlfriend and was still living in the apartment we used to share. She had just moved out at this point but, she was still driving me nuts, calling me and finding reasons to stop by unannounced. I was miserable but I had another month and half on the lease so, I could not move out yet. So, I sat alone in that apartment in Harwood Heights trying to enjoy the game even with the chaos all around me. It was weird.

Bulls Clinch 5^th title June 13^th 1997 – I was living in Elmwood Park at the time about to make the biggest mistake of my life and move in with my nut job ex. She came over with her son to watch the game. We made some popcorn and little did I know what utter madness the woman sitting next to me was about to cause me for the next year.

Bulls Clinch 4^th title June 16^th 1996 – It was Fathers Day. For some reason my Dad was in town for the occasion. So, that evening we all settled down to watch the game at my Aunt Joanne’s house. It was odd in that I think my friends and I watched every game of that magical season together but for the clincher I was surrounded by family. It was pretty cool.

Bulls Clinch 3^rd title June 20^th 1993 – For some reason my Mom and Lou went out somewhere to watch the game so, I had a ton of friends over to my house in Willow. I was dating Jenny and I remember her helping me get the house ready for my crew. I remember everybody myself included thinking that they were going to choke it away in the 4^th quarter. Then I remember Paxson hitting that jumper to win it. The noise from my house could have been heard in Phoenix.

Bulls Clinch 2^nd title June 14^th 1992 – Watched the game with my Mom, Lou, Uncle John, Aunt Kathy and Jenny at the house in Willow. I am sure others were there but I can’t remember the entire lineup. This game was memorable as the Bulls were losing the whole game. Then the bench players came in the 4^th quarter and got the Bulls the lead and MJ and company salted it away.

Bulls Clinch 1^st title June 12^th 1991 – Celebrated this one in Bedford Park at my Uncle John and Aunt Kathy’s house where they lived at the time. My Uncle John is probably the biggest influence on me as a sports fan. He is just as passionate and live and die with the teams he loves as I am. So, when a Chicago team has a chance to win a championship there are few others I would rather celebrate it with then him. Up to that point there wasn’t a whole lot to celebrate as a fan of the teams in the Windy City. That first Bulls championship will always be my favorite.

Cubs Clinch NL East Title September 26^th 1989 – I was working at Kmart. And like most weeknights I was scheduled to work that evening. The magic number was one. It had been a fun and crazy summer as the Cubs came out of nowhere to challenge for the division. This was back before cell phones and the internet. The only way for me to get updates on the score was to actually watch the contest. So, the game was on in the break room and it was on in the appliances section on the TV’s we had there. I was not going to miss them clinch it, if it was going to happen on this night. It was a close game and all night I was walking into appliances to catch the score and watch the action all without being caught slacking off my Mr. White the Kmart manager that evening, who was a great guy but a huge Sox fan and a huge Cub hater. The Cubs got a run in the 8^th to take a 3-2 lead. I was not going to miss the bottom of the ninth. To Mr. White’s credit he saw me in the break room at the start of the ninth and he never scolded me for being there watching it. As a matter of fact he was right next to me the whole time in the break room. The Expos would getting the tying run on 3^rd against our hair on fire closer Mitch Williams. But, the Wild Thing got the last hitter to strike out to win it. Mr. White shook my hand and offered me congratulations, with the stipulation, now get back to work. It was pretty funny.

Bears win Super Bowl January 26^th 1986 – I was 16. That 85 season was magical. In all honesty there has never been anything like it in Chicago from a sports perspective. Pretty much on a yearly basis my Mom and Lou threw a Super Bowl party regardless if he Bears were in it or not. This year would be no different. So, I was at my house on Sholer in Bridgeview watching it with the family. The game was over by halftime. I remember getting a call from Uncle John from a payphone at the Superdome as he was there in person. That was a call and celebration that I will always remember.

Cubs Clinch NL East September 24^th 1984 – This was a special one. The Cubs in my young adult life had never won a thing. On this evening I was at my Aunt Kathy and Uncle John’s house in Bridgeview watching the game with family and a lot of my Uncle’s friends from the White Hen he used to run. Sutcliffe was masterful that night and the outcome was really never in question. When they won it my Uncle popped some Champaign. I was a 15 year old kid and one of my favorite memories was having a bottle passed to me by an off duty Hickory Hills cop who was a friend of my Uncle’s and him urging me to enjoy some of the bubbly. With him telling me, kid this doesn’t happen often. It would be an utter joyful evening, in contrast to a couple of weeks later when they choked away a 2-0 lead in San Diego. When Durham booted that groundball, that was the exact moment I learned what it meant to be a Cubs fan.

Sporting Goons

There is nothing I love more than going to a baseball game. I love the sights and the smells. Even after all the games I have been to in my life I still get that same feeling walking into a park that I used to get as a ten year old boy. I know people will argue with me and have different opinions but, baseball is the greatest game ever invented.

I love more than anything managing along with the action on the field in my head. What pitch should the pitcher throw on a 2-2 count to a left handed fastball hitter who is looking inside? Where should the second baseman play a right handed pull hitter? Should the Cubs pinch hit for the pitcher in the 6^th inning of a tie game? There are so many little decisions like that throughout a nine inning contest. And trust me, as much as I like watching baseball on television you don’t get the same feel of the action like you do in the stands. My wife makes fun of me when I keep score, but in what other sport can you do that?

Anyway, I digress. I of course love no ballpark as much as I love Wrigley Field. I know Sox fans in particular love to knock it but, they are being dishonest with themselves if they are baseball fans and can’t find the beauty of Wrigley. I get not liking the Cubs, but not liking Wrigley is ludicrous. As much as I love Wrigley I still like to visit other parks as well. Every year for I don’t know how long now, I have made it a point to visit at least one new park a year. My goal of course is to hit every park in the majors.

And while I do enjoy seeing the park, tasting the food, and enjoying the game, dealing with fans is becoming less and less fun. I know I am going to sound like an angry old man here but I don’t care. Civility has long been a dying trait among our society. And there is no better place to see the lack of it then at a major league baseball game.

Now, when I wear a Cubs hat to an opposing team’s ballpark, I expect to get some good natured ribbing. I don’t mind that, as long as it is in good fun. But, the taunts and jeers have become hateful and that I just will never understand. No ballpark in America gets more fans from opposing teams then Wrigley. I have stated numerous times that as long as you are not being a jackass in rooting for your team I have no problem if you want to support your club on the road. When these people go home I want them to tell their friends and neighbors that they had a positive experience at Wrigley so, I will go out of my way to be cordial. A couple of weeks ago, I sat next to a fan who came in from Colorado and I wound up shooting the shit with him for almost the entire game.

However, the unruly behavior is becoming more and more commonplace. This isn’t about one teams fan base in particular because there are assholes among every team’s fans. So, I don’t want this to seem like I am picking on one group of spectators. I have seen this behavior at my own ballpark and it infuriates me when it happens.

From a personal perspective, the Cubs and Sox games are no doubt about it, the worst of the worst. Sure, wearing a Cub hat in Milwaukee now equates to taking your own life into your hands. But, the Cubs, Sox thing just brings out the worst in the feeble minded. It is like your life is so devoid of success that you have to glom onto your favorite baseball team to justify your existence. I will never understand the hatred of another person just because of what sporting team he or she roots for.

This all got serious on opening day in Los Angeles. Two Dodger fans brutally attacked a man wearing a Giants jersey and now that man lies in a coma and his prognosis is not good. Senseless is not a good enough adjective to describe this. I always tell my wife when the barbs start flying that it’s just a baseball game and it is all in good fun as long as no one gets hurt. But lately I have been looking over my shoulder for that one guy who is enjoying his first beer and can’t control his drunkenness.

My hope is that what took place in LA would serve as a wakeup call and fans would start behaving themselves, but we all know that is not going to happen. I still love traveling to other ballparks and the thuggish behavior of a few is not going to stop me from enjoying something that I love.

I guess really, going to a sporting event is just a microcosm of society as a whole. Everyone is angry about something. You can’t disagree with someone anymore you have to hate anyone who would happen to have a different opinion then you. I don’t know why we are all so mad, as living in America we sure have a lot better than most other people on this planet. I don’t have all the answers but little things like being civil to other people and showing them most basic of elements of respect might be a good place to start.

Three Bad Jokes

In honor of Thor being the number one film at the box office I thought I would take the time to tell one of my favorite jokes.

So Thor is up in the heavens and he hasn’t gotten any in awhile. And he is getting tired of Zeus busting his balls about it so he decides he is going to fly down to earth to see if he can seduce a young woman.

He walks into a bar and sees an attractive lady sitting alone by herself. He introduces himself and they start talking. She is nice and all but Thor notices that she has a lisp. But at this point he doesn’t care he has to wield the golden hammer.

So, she takes him back to her house and one thing leads to another and they start going at it. It has been a while and Thor is laying the pipe going to town all night. So, the morning comes and Thor starts feeling a little guilty as he has to go back up to the heavens. He wakes up his booty call and says, listen I have to be honest here, I’m Thor. She then replies, you think you’re thor!

Ok that one is a tad corny but it is still one of my favorites. If that is not your cup of tea let me try another oldie but goodie.

Three nuns die and go to heaven. St. Peter is there waiting at the gates and as they approach he tells them he must give them one last test of their religion. They will all need to answer one question to enter the pearly gates.

He then asks the first nun, who was the son of God? The nun answers, that’s easy Jesus. St. Peter says your right you can go on in. He then asks the second nun, who was the mother of Jesus? The second nun answers that’s easy, Mary. St. Peter says your right you can go on in. He then asks the third nun, what were the first words that Eve said to Adam? The third nun says, gee that’s a hard one. St. Peter says your right you can go on in.

Alright I am sure you are tired of groaning by now, so I only have one more for you.

A man with no arms is walking by a church and decides to go in and ask the Priest for some help. He finds the Priest and says Father, I am in desperate times do you have any jobs here that are available?

The priest then says, my son we only have one job and it is quite tedious and the money is not that good. The man desperate replies I don’t care Father I will take anything. So, the priest takes the man up to the bell tower and explains the job to him. “My son, every hour on the hour you need to be able to ring the bell for the appropriate time. Do you think you would be able to handle this task? Without skipping a beat the man answers yes.

So, the priest gives the man the job. One o’clock rolls around and the man has to figure out how to ring the bell without any arms. So, he takes a couple of steps back and runs head first into the bell and it rings. Every hour on the hour he keeps running into the bell getting woozier and woozier along the way.

Midnight finally arrives. He knows he is going to have to ring the bell twelve times. So, he takes a couple of extra steps back and runs towards the bell but misses it and falls off the tower to his death. A crowd gathers around and the police are called in. The first policeman arrives on the scene and finds the priest. He says, Father Do you know this man? The priest looks at him and says, I’m not sure but his face rings a bell.

Mr. DeWolf

Through all the years of my scholastic endeavors I have had a lot of teachers. Some were good, some were bad, most were just average. If you are lucky you have one instructor that makes an impact on you for the rest of your life. For me that teacher was Mr. DeWolf who was my history teacher at Argo.

We hit it off right away for some reason. Mr. DeWolf was a Viet Nam vet who was injured in combat when a tank he was in ran over a landmine. For the rest of his life to my knowledge he would have issues with loud noises. Which, you may think makes getting into teaching a curious career choice. But, he was born to be a teacher. American History could have been the most boring class I ever had, but because of Mr. DeWolf it would become the most interesting.

He didn’t lecture, he told stories. There is an art form to that and few were better than he was. It was easy to get him sidetracked and talking about his days in Nam. But, I learned more about that war and gained respect for not only him but everyone that got drafted and got sent over there to fight in that quagmire just by hearing him tell his personal accounts of what went on.

I was sixteen and I have to admit I was at the time not the best student. I was always joking around and at first didn’t really pay attention. But, that is how good Mr. DeWolf was. He somehow was able to spark an interest in the material he was teaching our class and it spoke to me. It got to the point where I actually enjoyed his lectures and going to his class.

That year we learned all about our past from the Revolutionary War all the way to Nam. Ted Karp, another student in the class and I got him talking about Rambo, the Stallone sequel to First Blood that had come out and was now on video. Somehow we got him to show our class the movie which I am sure if the powers that be knew, would have gotten him in trouble. But, he trusted us not to go blabbing about it and we never said a word.

I enjoyed his class so much that I wanted to make sure I had him again my senior year so, I took his World History course the next semester. That same year, I got into some trouble from time to time and had to serve some Saturday detentions. Mr. DeWolf was often charged with sitting with us on those Saturdays. The objective of a detention was to punish a student but with Mr. DeWolf it was difficult.

Those Saturday’s while we were supposed to be quiet and reading he would instead engage me in a conversation. We talked sports a lot. He was of course a huge Bears fan but he was also that rare breed on the south side, a Cubs fan as well. This was when the Bears were the God’s of the sport so it was high times and we enjoyed discussing the team often.

We also talked about other things as well. I told him I worked at White Hen and he often would joke with me that, if he didn’t get a course to teach over the summer he would have to go to work with me there. We discussed movies and lightly on politics. At that point in my life I didn’t care about anything political or history in general. But, after two years with Mr. DeWolf that all changed. I was interested in the subject matter because he made the subject matter interesting.

Eventually I graduated and left Argo and like I said, never had that kind of an interaction with a teacher again. I never forgot Mr. DeWolf but it had been years since I had seen him. Then one day somewhere on the internet, (I think this was in the days of MySpace) I read that he had passed away. A sadness washed over me. He taught thousands of kids in his time at Argo. I sat there hoping he knew before he died what an impact he had on those students. To this day, I am somewhat of a political junkie and love reading about our history and that all stems from him. He impacted my life and made me a better person. I am very grateful I got to be lectured by him, and wish he was still around so I could have told him in person.

I Need to Vent

I am not a patient man. I have tried working at it but, as they say it is hard to teach old dog new tricks. An extension of that is I am not very good waiting around for other people to do their work so, that I can finish mine. One reason I am good at what I do (at least in my opinion) is that I work quickly. I don’t like having things hanging over my head. If I know I have something to do, I don’t procrastinate and wait until the last minute to do it. I want to finish my task as soon as possible and clear my head.

Some would call this a type of disorder. But, I cannot get comfortable if I know I have some huge task waiting for me. I want to get it done and then I can relax. The problem hits home when I am no longer in control of the situation. Meaning that in order for me to complete my work, I need someone else to complete theirs.

Recently, I have been traveling for work doing circuit upgrades. I don’t want to bore those out there who could care less about backend computer and networking tasks. Most people just want their computer to turn on and be able to surf porn on the internet in peace. They don’t want to know what makes it work and I get that. So, I will make this short, sweet and generic. I need to go to a site and replace their old equipment with new equipment that will make things not only run faster but allow them to replace their phone systems with new, exciting voice over internet phones, which is much cheaper.

I cannot replace the equipment until a vendor we use configures one piece. I won’t name them but let’s just say the company in question rhymes with horizon. Now, if I am going to a site I usually have to travel to it. Also, since I have to take the site down for awhile, I need to make sure ahead of time what date and time is kosher for me to do so. I always make sure to plan this well in advance to give the site, our network engineer guy, and the vendor plenty of time to get their work done.

Sadly, often times even with the advance planning I am often left waiting around for someone else to get their crap done. Now, I don’t want to knock the vendor because I have also worked with some excellent techs from the company. But, I have also dealt with pure incompetence. If everyone has done their job properly it should take me no more than an hour to swap out all the hardware. The last site I did took almost four hours to complete. The person who was supposed to configure a piece of hardware that in the past I have seen done in minutes took hours. The sad part is the guy would not ask for help.

Because of this the site is down and I am left sitting there with nothing better to do then diddle myself while he tries to figure out how to do his job. Fumes were coming out of my ears as I sat there waiting while he kept failing. There was nothing I could do. At long last he calls another tech and that guy saw the problem and fixed it in like 10 minutes. I was beyond pissed at that point.

This is why I have always lived by the old adage if you want something done right do it yourself. I know myself and I will know who to blame should something not work. Maybe I just have an issue where I need to be in control. Whatever the root of the issue is, at my age I way too old to change. I know that no matter what, that in the future situations like this will arise again. I just have to accept it and hope that there are no delays.

Lastly, I don’t want it to sound like I have a problem working with others or as part of a team because I truly don’t. Also, I realize I am far from perfect. But, when I know others are depending on me to do my job so they can do theirs I do everything in my power to make sure my shit is taken care of. It is simple common courtesy. Okay, I vented, I’m better.