Nick's Pickle

So, here is my dilemma. I finally got around to passing the C.N.A. exam. So, now I have my basic four certifications that the bank wants. I am A+ and N+ certified. I also have my MCP (Microsoft Certified Professional) and the C.N.A (Certified Novell Administrator.) So at this point I have to make a decision. Do I go toward a Novell track or leap onto Microsoft like the rest of the world.

Personally, I like Novell much better. It is a better product, and it is what I know. I was raised in Novell shops my entire career. This is a rare thing as most companies use Microsoft Networking. While, I have supported Microsoft Domains and know a little about Active Directory I am much stronger with Novell.

You see IRI was a Novell shop. Since that is where I cut my teeth that is what I have always known. I than moved onto Monsanto, which had both a Microsoft and Novell networking structure. At Harris again, I was in a Novell environment and here at Bank One it is a mainly Novell shop with some Microsoft services around. So, I have a lot of experience with Novell. I am comfortable in it having worked with it for a while. Also, since Microsoft has a monopoly on operating systems I kind of want Novell to have some market share so I’ve always rooted for them.

The problem is that Novell currently has like thirteen percent of the market share. Novell jobs are few and far between. Since most companies are Microsoft shops, there are a lot more jobs out there for people with an MCSE (Microsoft Certified Systems Engineer) than those with a C.N.E (Certified Novell Engineer.) So, for my next certifications I have to think long and hard. I guess to save myself I should just go and get both. However, that may take a couple of years.

All this is bullshit anyways because certifications are bullshit. You see, certifications are big in my industry and let me be the first to say they are a complete joke. Any manager who places faith in the certification program is lazy and dim witted. I guess I should explain. Certifications are usually from Microsoft, CISCO, or Novell and what happens is you get some cheat sheet and memorize all the answers. You then go in and take a test and when you regurgitate the answers and pass it, you get a certification. It means nothing and it in no way is any measurement of a person’s ability to do a job.

After working in this field for as long as I have I run into many people that I call paper certification holders. They study for the test, pass it and then get hired solely because of some piece of paper. Meantime they have no experience and zero idea how to do the job. I worked with this one guy, at Harris who had all the certifications you could want. However, he was clueless when we tried to explain to him how to support a computer. As I have maintained for years there is a huge difference between being book smart and being practical and logical. This guy was very book smart and knew a lot of things about many subjects. But, when it came to logic and applying what he knew into results he failed miserably. He eventually got put into the least demanding and un important job in IT.

So, while I am happy I have passed the test, I now must figure out which test to take next. I will most likely go for my C.N.E, which means I will be stuck at the bank for a while. Which is not necessarily a bad thing. Microsoft is coming out with a new infrastructure soon anyway and I might as well wait and go for those cert’s when they come out. Or maybe I should just build a time machine and go back to 1992 and warn myself about going into this field, and having to deal with all this nonsense.

(I bet with the title to this blog you were thinking it was going to be about a different subject matter.)

Netflix Toilet

Here is another brief summary of the last five Netflix flicks I’ve watched.

Finder’s Fee – Another rental that was recommended by a friend that did not pan out. A good premise and a decent cast (James Earl Jones, Ryan Reynolds and Matthew Lillard,) but just does not deliver. The ending sucked so much that it completely ruins any chance of liking it.

Taking Lives – Not sure what made me rent it, other than it sounded like a cool idea. In the end it turned out to another formulated, stereotypical “thriller.” Angelina Jolie does not hurt the eyes but she can’t act her way out of a paper bag. Kiefer Sutherland is in the movie for less than five minutes so; I’m not sure why he even bothered. Trust me, don’t waste your time with this stinker.

The Grudge – The movie got ripped in its reviews but, I had a couple of people tell me it was pretty good. So, I rented it hoping to be surprised, I wasn’t. Sarah Michelle Geller is another bad actress who zombifies her way through this snooze fest. I thought the goal of a horror movie was to scare or at least get you on the edge of your seat. This movie does not do either. I’ve heard the original Japanese version is much better, I may give that a whirl.

Envy – I am a huge Jack Black fan. I will watch him in anything, and thisn is proof of that. This movie completely wastes his and Ben Stiller’s talents. Christopher Walkin is also in it for no particular reason. The “plot” is ludicrous and the action crawls slower than a snails pace. It’s not funny, it’s predictable and proves no matter the star, you still need a good script.

Cellular – The ultimate sideways thumb movie. It didn’t suck yet, I didn’t love it either. It’s a thriller and I guess it has some moments. However, you really need to suspend disbelief. That said if you want a movie that let’s you escape for awhile in car chases and Kim Bassinger well, than give it a rental.

My Monthly Purge

It is time for a monthly venting. If it seems like I have a lot of things that anger me well, I admit it, I do. I guess I am the conscience of America and I have no other way to get these things off my chest other than to bitch about them on this blog. There is a great moment in the movie Ghost World. Steve Bucehmi says to Thora Birch, “It’s easy for everyone else, just give them a Big Mac and a pair of Nike’s and their happy.” Often times that is exactly how I feel.

People Who Substitute Dogs for Children – There is nothing worse or more inhumane than some yuppie scum who has a dog and treats them like a child. Listen, I like dogs. The reason this bothers me is that I believe a dog should be able to run around in a back yard. They should also be free to shit when they want. These urban yuppies that get dogs and live in the city should be arrested. It is pathetic to see these morons walking around picking up dog shit. It also inhumane to keep a dog cooped up in a tiny apartment all day. If you want a house pet get a cat.

The Term Happy Camper- Everytime I hear this term my skin crawls. There is nothing more un-hip or lame than using it. First off, people who use it are trying to be cleaver. Well, let be the first to say once a term gets assimilated into modern society and is regarded as the norm the term ceases being cute, funny or original. Happy camper is right up with; you go girl, talk to the hand and all that and a bag of chips. Get out of 1983 and come up with a some new slogans.

Reese Witherspoon – Just a complete bitch. Pure and simple. Now, I do not know her personally however, every time I read an article with her she comes off as a spoiled prissy complainer. Also, many who have worked with her have complained about her being difficult. On top of all that, after taking some great early roles like Election and Freeway now she makes nothing but Sweet Home Alabama movies. I hate this woman and more so I hate America for making her a star.

Pushy Salesman – There is nothing I hate more than when I am trying to shop and some greasy salesman comes slithering up and asks me if I need help. If I need help I will ask for it. What’s worse is when you tell the salesman you are just looking they then keep pestering you. I try to be an informed consumer. I know what I want and I don’t need some business school dropout helping me pick out my new refrigerator. I can do that all by myself. I won’t even get into used car salesmen.

Smoke Nazi’s – I do not smoke. So, this is not coming from a smoker’s perspective. To me it is a free country. If you choose to smoke, be my guest they are your lungs. The Smoke Nazi brigade is going to come at you with second hand smoke. If any of these morons looked at the facts they might just learn something about second hand smoke. First off, second hand smoke has never been linked to one case of lung cancer ever. Never, not anywhere on earth. You see the EPA produced the original, and only second hand smoke article in 1993. One paper that’s it. That paper than was quickly found to contain false data and has since been discredited by the AMA. However, you never read about that. It’s all bullshit and if I am in a bar, damn it I expect smoke. So, please America stop passing anti-smoking legislation already and quit telling everyone how to live, which brings me to my next bitch.

Sin Taxes - The ultimate in bullshit is sin taxes. To have a special tax on beer and cigarettes is wholly unfair. If you are going to tax booze and cigarettes than we should also tax, SUV’s, soda pop, potato chips, cable TV, frozen pizza and hair spray. All of those things are not really necessary. There are alternatives to each product I mentioned. Also, all of those can place a burden on society. So why are Miller High Life and Newport’s getting a special tax and Doritos’s aren’t?

Body Odor – There is nothing worse or more revolting than some sweaty, stinky un-bathed human body odor. I can take rotting garbage, flatulence and stink bombs. What I cannot take is being next to somebody on the train or behind someone in line at the store who felt that they did not feel the need to bathe. The human body when not maintained properly omits an order that is beyond revolting. You can usually see them (or smell them) coming a mile away. They are overweight, wearing sweat pants which haven’t been washed since the Regan administration, their hair is as greasy as a Fasino’s pizza, and their fingernails have turned a nice shade of yellow. When I see them coming at me I run but usually I am to late and their funk has left me in a temporary state of repulsion.

Cheap Skates – There is noting worse than some rich asshole that tosses around nickels like they are manhole covers. There is an old saying you can’t take it with you and I often sit and wonder just what are these pricks holding onto their money for. You know the type, they come to a party and bring a six-pack of Old Milwaukee and wind up drinking all of your Heineken. They buy socks for Christmas and never pitch in when the bill comes. I guess rich people get rich by not wasting money and I guess that is why I will never be rich.

Sex and the City – This show simply blows. Now I am a man and maybe it’s just me but I never found this show funny. I did however find the four women in it very annoying. Let me get this straight, four women in their late thirties sitting around and moaning about how they aren’t getting laid enough and how their tits are starting to sag. And, people actually choose to watch this? The show is nothing but escapism, which is ok, but please save me all the how great the writing is on the show crap. This show is like nails on a chalkboard to me and is further proof while I will never understand women.

Cub's Fever: Catch It, Than See A Shrink

It was a game that started an hour and a half late because of a rain delay. It would be a game the Cubs actually would win, but it would also be the game when the season officially ended. Fifteen games in and trust me the season is over. It ended when Nomar Garciparra hit a ground ball to short and tore his groin muscle running to first. At that point Porky Pig should have came in and said, “That’s all folks.”

You see this Cubs team barely has enough talent when healthy to contend for a wild card spot let alone a division title. Already we’ve been hit with are two “ace” starters battling arm ailments in spring training and our closer breaking a bone in his pitching hand. The second basemen blew out his knee on a double play and now our shortstop is out three to four months. I am not sure what God’s the Cubs have pissed of but they sure can hold a grudge.

So as the Cubs now sit at 8-8 I figure at best that is where they will finish. With all things being equal they are a .500 team. They don’t play smart baseball; they are suspect on defense and have a manager who is clueless. Dusty Baker is the worst in game manager I’ve ever seen don the Cub pinstripes ever. Mind you I’ve seen, Preston Gomez, Lee Ellia, Jim Essian, Bruce Kim, Don Baylor, Tom Treblehorn, and Jim Riggleman try to steer the ship as well. While all of them were unquestionably bad managers Dusty beats them all. I could harp on so many things that this blog would go longer than War and Peace.

His insistence on batting Patterson in the leadoff spot is the toper. The kid has drawn two walks all year. A leadoff hitter is supposed to set the table. Not swing at balls over their head. Also he won’t play Jason Dubois, a rookie who shows promise over two long in the tooth outfielders Burnitz and Hollandsworth. He keeps putting Hawkins in the ninth inning were he has consistently failed. And of course, he blamed all of last years failures on, you guessed it the media.

You see Steve Stone could out mange Baker in his sleep. Baker knows it and always felt threatened by his presence in the booth. Stone would question Baker’s moves before the ultimate implosion and then Dusty would accuse Stone of second-guessing. So, this year with Stone not around he is blaming the media for causing a controversy over playing time. His whole act is stale and I almost want the team to fall on its ass so we can get rid of him already.

The Cub team last year is the least likeable I’ve ever seen and this one isn’t much better. With all the injuries they have had to endure you quickly get reminded of the John Lennon line of “Instant Karma is Going to get You.” This team excels in bitching and moaning. I guess it is more a sign of the times with modern athletes but it all stems from the top. When the players see their manager going at it with the press, they feel they can do the same.

So, even though it is early April, another Cubs season has gone down in flames. This year will make 97 without a championship. Think about just how long that is. Teddy Roosevelt was in the White House. As a Cub fan I am sick of the bullshit and excuses. I want to win and not next year, but now. The Tribune prints money and at this point needs to go out and spend it and get the fans who’ve lined their pockets all these years a team that can win the whole damn thing. Division titles, and wild cards won’t do it for me anymore. I am greedy. I think I’ve seen enough losing to have built enough character. I want to win and I want to start now.

Book Report

It is time for another book report. Here are some brief summaries of the last five books I’ve read.

On the Run: A Mafia Childhood by Greg and Gina Hill – After having read three books on the life of Henry Hill, I can now be called on expert on the matter. This book has a very different tone since it comes from the kid’s perspective. Basically they both hate their father and no longer have anything to do with him. How they got out of that situation with any sanity is beyond me. As someone who loves mafia related books and movies this is look at the very ugly side of that world.

Juiced Wild Times, Rampant Roids, Smash Hits, and How Baseball Got Big by Jose Conseco – As a baseball fan I of course had to read this book. Basically this is a 304-page advertisement for what good can come from steroids. While you may agree or disagree with that position does not matter as Conseco showed his true colors by bashing his own book when he testified before congress and reversed himself on everything. Other than that the book is an interesting enough read for any baseball fan.

It’s My Party Too: The Battle for the Heart of GOP and the Future of America by Christine Todd Whitman – I know what you are thinking, Nick a commie liberal reading a book by a Republican? Well, if all Republicans were as clear minded and sharp as this lady I’d have a ton of more respect for that party. Her point is that the christen right has taken over the party and now the GOP has become nothing more than a mouthpiece for the Jerry Fawell of the world. I understand conservative principles. I may not agree with them but I understand them. What I don’t understand is hard line bullying politics that alienates everyone who just might have a different viewpoint. A must read for both sides of the aisle.

Nickel and Dimed: On (Not) Getting By in America by Barbara Ehreneich – The author is charged by her editor to go undercover and get minimum paying jobs and see if she can live on them. She quickly realizes that she cannot. She would have to work three of them to have any chance. She waits tables, works for a maid service and than goes to work at Wal-Mart. All with varying degrees of failures. She lives at a flophouse and eats nothing but fast food. Also exposes the ridicules hiring polices of these corporate monstrosities.

Ron Kittle’s Tales From the White Sox Dugout by Ron Kittle – Being a Cub fan it is rare that I would read anything about the south side team. However, I always liked Kittle and thought he would have some funny stories in the book. While there are a couple overall the book is a drag. Kittle holds back on a lot of things and unlike a book like Ball Four (Which I will compare every players book to) does not offer much in the way of anything interesting. I guess to Kittle and his cronies these stories are funny, but to the reader it is snoreville.

God help Us

I bitch a lot about religion and the fanatics who have been brain washed. I know I have a huge chip on my shoulder when it comes to this subject but it just infuriates me. In Nick’s world religion should be a private thing. Believe what you want but don’t get all in my face with it.

With that said recent events have caused my ire to get stirred more and more lately. I guess it started with the passing of the Pope. While, I a disagreed with him on a ton of things, I always respect someone who was trying to do good, no matter how misguided I felt his thinking was sometimes. However I felt about his stances on abortion, gays and women, I still felt that the he was a good man. He had a long life and now if you are to believe his teachings he is resting in eternall bliss up in heaven with God, Jesus and the rest of the gang.

When, he died a couple of weeks ago the outpour of sorrow was sickening. People were literally crying in the streets over his passing like they actually knew him. I have never understood this behavior. I was sad at my Grandfather’s funeral because I knew him. How can you be so heartbroken over the death of someone you never met? What really boggled my mind was that by his teachings heaven is a pretty good place that at the end of a long life one should feel pretty excited about entering.

While, I was reading in disbelief about all the mourners who were waiting up to a day in line just for the chance to walk by his casket, I thought about just how sad that really was. Many others will come to me with the argument that those people have tremendous faith. I say they have stopped thinking for themselves and have become automatons. I understand if you don’t have much in life you tend to cling to outdated beliefs and rituals. Organized religion is good at brainwashing the masses and selling miracles. The truth is to pray to a faceless God, simply because you have faith in an institution that no one has any tangible proof exists is a waste of time. I believe if there is a God, I will be judged on what type of person I am, not over all this other nonsense.

All this boiled over this morning. I came upon an article that at first made me laugh and now makes me furious. In today’s Chicago Sun Times (http://www.suntimes.com/output/news/cst-nws-virgin19.html) an article appeared claiming people saw the Virgin Mary in salt run off under a bridgem in Chicago. This is further proof that the brain washing has worked. People it is salt run off pure and simple. For hundreds of people to waste their time by taking pictures and praying to rain water and salt that dried in the shape of a woman is a complete joke.

You may ask just why does this bother you so much? The reason is that it is thinking like this that has immersed itself into everyday life. It’s like if you are a reasonable self-thinking person you are in the minority. Those who jump to radical conformist opinions based on theological teachings are winning. Don’t believe me, just look around. We can’t watch live TV anymore because of a two second nipple flash. Everywhere you look politicians are talking about moral values and how sinful this and that is. Our Government is holding emergency sessions to try to stop a mercy killing. To me, those are scary things and make me want to throw my hands up and just quit. I won’t simply because I know history will show just how un-enlightened of times we live in. In 80 years when Gays have the same rights as anyone else people will look back and wonder how fanatical religious thinking was prevalent at the beginning of the century.

Nick's Back

I am back at work and thus I am back from vacation. It was nice being away from the rat race for a couple of weeks. To catch up I will review the last two weeks of my life.

On Monday the 4^th I started a Novell class at work. It was a weeklong session. Most of the classes I take from work are a waste, but this class was actually really good. I am taking the 4^th of the four tests I need to take at work. After I become a C.N.A. (Certified Novell Administrator,) I can move on to other groups at work as opposed to being stuck in desktops. I am studying now and hope to have it passed in the next couple of weeks.

So, my real vacation started on Saturday the 9^th. I had a whole list of things I wanted to get done. So here in a nutshell is what I did.

Saturday April 9^th – I went to Menard's and picked up some stain, a brush and a roller for my deck. I needed to stain it and wanted to have the materials available so that I could do so when the weather permitted. Joyce and I also decided since it was such a nice day out to take a bike ride. There is an antique store by our house and we stopped in. Joyce found a couple of items she really liked so, we purchased them and since we were on bikes I arranged with the owner to pick them up on Sunday. We then went to Bowling Alley near our house had a beer and headed home.

Sunday April 10^th – Since the weather permitted I decided to stain the deck. I put the Cubs game on the radio and got on all fours and knocked it out. It took a couple of hours but once it was done I had a sense of accomplishment. I also headed to the antique store to pick up our purchases. My friend Ronnie than called me and told me he was BBQ’ing for the Sox game that night. So, I went to the liquor store bought some PBR and headed over. I ate and drank like a lemur and headed home, satisfied

Monday April 11^th – It was a bright beautiful day out so, I figured to get some more outdoor work done. My deck needed three spindles replaced so again I was off to Menard’s. After some doing there I was able to get the spindles. I then headed home to screw them into my deck. Once installed I then stained them to match and was off to Jewel where I had some chicken for lunch. I put on the Cubs game and bitched myself out for not going since it was a beautiful day. However, I knew I was going on Tuesday so I was content.

Tuesday April 12^th – I got up and it was pouring outside. I checked the weather report and it said showers off and on throughout the day. It was also 40 degrees out but I still decided to head down to Wrigley to try and catch the game. So, I get my ass to Midway, hop on the Orange line, than transfer to the Red and get off on Addison. It is still early so, I head into Bernie’s to get out of the rain. There I drink five dollar and fifty cent Rolling Rock’s. I also grab a quick burger as I wait for Don and Rob, two friends who were going with me, to get there. The rain just kept coming and never stopped. Right around the time my friends got to the bar, the game was called. So, we hoped and the red line to go home. It was about 2:30 when I walked in the door and I had just wasted one of my days off.

Wednesday April 13^th – I woke up and again it sucked outside. It was no longer raining but it was damn cold. I could have headed down to Wrigley again as the Cubs were playing a doubleheader. However I was in no mood to sit through eighteen innings of baseball, the whole time freezing my ass off. So, I instead decided to run a bunch of errands. I went to Best Buy, Ace Hardware, Cub Foods, and the dollar store and I grabbed some lunch at Wendy’s. Since it was cold out I figured I would get some indoor things done. I vacuumed, started the laundry, and did the dishes. I than sat down to watch the Cubs split a doubleheader. The phone than rang and it was the Oak Lawn Park District telling me that my softball team was going to be accepted and that they needed the entrance fee as soon as possible. So, I had to run to their offices and drop off a check. The wife and I went to eat at Joe’s Italian Villa and I settled down to watch Finder’s Fee, which I got from Nexflix.

Thursday April 14^th – My day began with a call from Joe, the pitcher on our softball team telling me that he had a sponsor for the team. So, I hop in my car and meet Joe and this really nice lady named Lori, who owned the bar. The bar was located in Crestwood, which is a little bit of a ride, but, she was offering to not only sponsor us but to get us jerseys as well. I figured after calling around and not hearing much that this was a good deal so I jumped at it and took a check from her. I then head home and since the weather was now much improved I figured I’d finish my outdoor activities. I got the gas grill ready, by cleaning and hooking it up. I put out al of my patio furniture and my outdoor fire pit. I also put together this plastic container I bought at Ace. So, my deck was now officially completed. I grabbed some lunch at Peppo’s (A great deli by my house) and took my wife’s car to get an oil change. That night the wife and I dined at Chuck’s BBQ. I then get home to have a message on my voice mail from my friend Chris telling me that the Castle, a bar in Burbank had agreed to sponsor us. So, I knew I was going to have to deal with that on Friday.

Friday April 15^th – I got up and called Chris and after talking with him I got the feeling that most of the team was not going to drive out to Crestwood to go to the bar after the games. So, I returned the check that Lori had given me and I agreed to meet the owner of the Castle. I headed there and he agreed to sponsor us and my friend Ronnie hooked us up with jerseys. All of this reminded me why I had avoided running the team all these years. It is a pain in the ass and offers very little rewards. At the Castle, I was well on my way to getting loaded when I realized it was 3:30 in the afternoon and maybe I should slow down. So, I drank some water ate some food and went home to meet Joyce. We then grabbed a bite to eat at Ruby Tuesday’s (A corporate food place but, sometimes you have to compromise) and we went home to watch The Grudge.

Saturday April 16^th – Joyce and I slept in and when we did get up grabbed lunch at Potbelly’s. I than ran to Menard’s to buy some pegboard which I need to get hung in the garage, while Joyce did some house work. We then both headed to Sournorsis, which is a garden center near our house. We bought some bushes for the front of the house and Joyce bought some other plants. After eating a pizza at home, I had to pick up my friend Don, and head back the Castle once again as it was another friend, Keith’s birthday party. I had a couple of Miller High Life drafts and headed home for the evening.

Sunday April 17^th – Sadness set in knowing it was my last day of bliss. I planted the bushes, which took forever as I had to dig the hole, put the bush in, add top soil, water, and then add more soil and re-water. I caught the end of the Cub’s game and headed over to Jack and Pat’s to pick up some meat to grill. Jack and Pat’s is one of the last genuine butcher shops I know of. They without any doubt have the burgers in the world. I grabbed some and some buns and headed home. Joyce ran to the fruit market near our house and brought home some mushrooms, eggplant and zucchini for me to grill as well. I grilled everything up and had a hearty dinner. I then settled in to watch the Simpson’s and Arrested Development knowing full well that my vacation was over. Don’t cry for me as I have another vacation coming up in June.

A Break

Sorry for the lack of posts. I will be in training all this week and on vacation next. I have a ton of things to bitch about but they will have to wait until the 18th. Check back then.

A New Begining

I have decided to finally trade in my Cubs hat and give in to my south side roots and switch sides. I will now be a Sox fan. I can no longer take the heartache and despair the Cubs offer. While, I realize that the Sox haven’t won a pennant in over 45 years either at least I am among fellow Sox fans and hey misery loves company.

So, I will now take up the process of creating a chip on my shoulder. I will now compare the White Sox not to the other inhabitants of the AL Central but to the Cubs. I must learn to bitch about, anything and everything. I need to develop that us against the world mentality as well. I must also, hate ivy and good looking women. As I have learned it comes with the territory when you become a Sox fan.

I also need to buy a good and steady ruler. I know that by being a Sox fan I have to measure all the space in the Sun Times and the Tribune dedicated to the Cubs and Sox and measure them. I need to do this to prove my paranoia about being the second team in the second city. Because we all know the Cubs get at least three more inches of press each week. I also must start taping sports radio to validate what all Sox fans know as true, there is a definite Cubs bias on the airwaves.

Unfortunately, I am a little late on getting my Sosa sucks tee shirts but I can always go with the classic Cubs suck shirt. It is the official uniform for us hardened bitter Sox fans. The best thing about becoming a Sox fan is that, now I will become instantly smarter and a better fan. Since we know all Cub fans care about is drinking and hitting on girls in the stands, by becoming a Sox fan, I automatically increase my baseball IQ and I guess I will have to join AA as apparently they don’t sell beer at Comiskey, I mean US Cellular Field.

Also, I have already started growing my hair out in the back to get my official Sox mullet. Any good Sox fan has to have the old school retro 80’s mullet. I also, must learn to love the phrases, He gone, Put it on the board, Stretch, and Grab some bench. On top of all this I get the added benefit of watching exciting 10-8, four and a half hour, Designated Hitter, American League Baseball.

So, from now on it will be GO YOU WHITE SOX. Being already a pessimist and somewhat bitter I should fit right in to White Sox nation. I figure, if I learn the sha-na-na song and start taking more pleasure in the failure of the Cubs than in the winning of my own team I should fit right in.